We’ve got National Grid straightened around… sort of.  We at least got them to give us till the 1st, finally.  Wanna talk about pulling teeth? Utility companies should be tried for terrorism.

So our only worry was Time Warner.  We don’t owe them a lot.  I think the bill was $163 and change; $107 of it actually past due.  And just like with National Grid, we only needed a few days.  Four, to be exact.  And only two of them were business days.  But we’d already had our one extension every six months, and Time Warner, like National Grid, refused to budge.

Okay.  No big deal.  M could have gone into the office if it got shut off.  It’s not like not having internet for four days would kill us. 

They tell me that, so long as the service wasn’t shut off at the pole, I could pay the $107 and get it turned back on, or save it from being turned off in the office.  If it’s not shut off at the pole, there are no disconnect/reconnect fees, and there’s usually no wait to have it restored.  They can restore it while you’re on the phone with them.  And you can just pay the past due amount.  But if it’s shut off at the pole, they make you pay the full bill and disconnect/reconnect fees.

Cool.  We just have to get together $107 and we can pay it.

M raised $114 just under the wire.  I called to pay the bill.  And the woman says to me, “There’s a five dollar processing fee.  Would you still like to pay the bill?”

Wait… what? Nobody ever told me about a $5 processing fee.

You mean to tell me it costs you $5 worth of resources to process my credit card payment over the phone? And you’re telling me that you, a nationwide company whose net income (or what was left after they paid all their employees and bills) last year was $1.1 billion dollars, really needs that $5 processing fee? Really?

I call bullshit.

And what the fuck is up with you charging me to pay you? No, really… I have to pay you to pay you? What kind of bullshit is that?

So I suppose it’s lucky M was able to raise $114 because the total bill, with this fucking processing fee that shouldn’t even be legal, came to $111 and change.  And that extra $5? Yeah it doesn’t even go toward my bill.

Can you believe this shit?

More importantly, can you believe that we, free Americans, are just sitting on our thumbs and allowing the government to allow this shit? What the fuck is wrong with us?